In The Middle

I meant it all and every part
And every word right from the start
I'll never let this love fall in the middle
'Cause you know you broke the hardest part
You know you broke the hardest heart
I'll never let this love fall in the middle
Through it all

Fifteen years old in a sea of blank faces
Swimming bold against a stream that's mocking as it races
In these halls, mountain high under a tangerine sky
Crack a smile just to hide the race that's inside
Eighteen years old bags packed and a pass for the rail
One last look at the past as it drowns in the hail
One in a million, still I keep feeling you keep me from a fall
A world to lose coming back with you tall
Through it all


No parachutes or safety nets here
One foot in the water to face these fears
Coming out strong like I can't be wrong
I said eh, I won't fall in the middle

Twenty five here I am with freshman LPs
One life to write one, two years to repeat
Behind a curtain, uncertain if an encore's in store
Tuck my shoulder like a soldier to knock down the door
Thirty something here I am running with kisses for one girl
These scars upon my sleeve still casting out my pearls
Throw each stone microphone like it's my last turn
With a kiss to the abyss and watch the ripples return
Through it all


And I'm gonna be alright, I'm gonna be alright
With you by my side
And I said I'm gonna be alright, I'm gonna be alright
With you through this fight
Through it all


I meant it all and every part
And every word right from the start
I'll never let this love fall in the middle
Through it all

"I'm So Sick"

I will break into your thoughts
With what's written on my heart
I will break, break

I'm so sick,
Infected with where I live
Let me live without this
Empty bliss,
Selfishness
I'm so sick
I'm so sick

If you want more of this
We can push out, sell out, die out
So you'll shut up
And stay sleeping
With my screaming in your itching ears

I'm so sick,
Infected with where I live
Let me live without this
Empty bliss,
Selfishness
I'm so sick
I'm so sick

Hear it, I'm screaming it
You're heeding to it now

Hear it! I'm screaming it!
You tremble at this sound

You sink into my clothes
And this invasion
Makes me feel
Worthless, hopeless, sick

I'm so sick,
Infected with where I live
Let me live without this
Empty bliss,
Selfishness
I'm so sick
I'm so sick

I'm so sick
Infected with where I live
Let me live without this
Empty bliss, selfishness
I'm so
I'm so sick
I'm so
I'm so sick

"All Around Me"

My hands are searching for you
My arms are outstretched towards you
I feel you on my fingertips
My tongue dances behind my lips for you

This fire rising through my being
Burning I'm not used to seeing you

I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

My hands float up above me
And you whisper you love me
And I begin to fade
Into our secret place

The music makes me sway
The angels singing say we are alone with you
I am alone and they are too with you

I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

And so I cry
The light is white
And I see you

I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

Take my hand
I give it to you
Now you own me
All I am
You said you would never leave me
I believe you
I believe

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healed

Twisted Thoughts

And all these twisted thoughts I see
Jesus, there in between

I see only cancer, My eyes turning red

Wow, It's been such a long time, since I last posted. I must get back into this. Alot seems to be going off in my life, and I find it so easy to loose myself in whats going off around me, and getting too caught up in all the grinds of day to day life. Life can really overwhelm you, blocking your vision, giuding, or should I say 'pulling you'? in wrong directions. Sometimes its hard to see where we shoild be heading, or what we shoud be doing, we loose track of our faith or put God to one side, thinking we can get by with it. but we know we can't.

I've just been talking to a good Friend Lou, who I've known for years, well since i was born. she was telling me about her best friend, who is dieing of cancer. Lou and her husband went down to somerset on Saturday, to see her friend, and it was to say their final goodbyes. I can't begin to imagine how hard that must have been for both of them!. I don't think i could have done it. But Lou told me that her friend is feeling comfortable, and is at peace knowing Jesus is waiting for her! WOW, That's faith! I know if it was me, I'd be scared. even though I believe in God, with a passion, I still don't think, i could go through such a situation with the same mentality!

The idea of having blurred or tampered vision is something that playing on my heart at the mo, it started when I meet up with Josh from the band to plan a music workshop we were to be doing. In the band we have a song called dead ends and trapdoors. I had played the song in the band, numerous times, and had heard the lyrics, but it wasn't until me and josh spook about tthe song that i acctualy notticed the meaning, one like that stands out to me is

'I see only cancer, my eyes turning red.'

The Vision of having a blocked vision, seeing red, anger, or danger! not being able to see the true picture/image. The cancer causing my eyes to see red! the cancer being anything that draws me away from God. I need to resolve this, focus on God, Give back to him what is his! restore my vision! see the bigger picture! clear the crap! climb out of the ditch and view the whole world! in my true Vision, in Gods vision!