Don't let my past bring you down.

Sometimes we let our past haunt us, wrong decisions that come back and bite us on the arse, lies that cause trouble later on, come on, we have all lied at some point or another, and then get caught out. Silly things that cause hurt, upset and anger. I would be the first to admit that I wish I had donethings differently. I wish I took different steps in life, I often wonder what would have happened if....

But in reality we can't go back, we can't change things. We can rectify them, work out our mistakes. Start anew, but even if we had a new start, how long would it be till we wanted to start anew again? I guess I'm saying, no matter how many fresh start at e we get, we would always want another.

I really wanted to start this year different, Changing my attitudes, Helping more where I can, being the person God wants me to be, not the person I want to be! I've tried to be different but I often set my self back, doing something I'm not prod aout, saying something wrong or acting childish.

It's taken me a while, well most of mylie to realise myactions don't just effect me, they effect the people around me, my family, my friends, and my girlfriend. I often get asked by people abou my past, things like how did you do at school?, or what relationships have you been in and what happened to them? I find it hard to answer some questions, because they remind me of the things I'mnot so proud about, I didn't dotoo well in school, I didn't work, I messed about, I caused trouble, my past relationships are difficult to talk about to, I feel foolish and nieve, but no matter what I cant change what has hapened in my past, as much as I would like to, I can't.

I don't what my past to haunt me anymore, I do't want it to effect me, or the people around me, and I don't want it to effect the person I love, I don't want people dwelling on it, I want a new start! and ant the people around me to share in my new start, lead me, throw me, take me through this show me I am a different person! I really want this tobemy last new start, I know I can make this work.